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  • Is Santa Real?

    (oldie, but goodie)

    There are approximately two billion children ( persons under 18 ) in the
    world.

    However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or
    Buddhist religions (except maybe in Japan) , this reduces the workload for
    Christmas night to about 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the
    Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children
    per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at
    least one good child in each.

    Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different
    time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west
    (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second.

    This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa
    has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the
    chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the
    tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney,
    jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house.

    Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around
    the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the
    purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per
    household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops
    or breaks.

    This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second--3,000 times
    the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made
    vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second,
    and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

    The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that
    each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the
    sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On
    land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even
    granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount,
    the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them--Santa would need
    360,000 of them.

    This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another
    54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the
    ship, not the monarch). 600,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second
    creates enormous air resistance--this would heat up the reindeer in the
    same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead
    pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second
    each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously,
    exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in
    their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporised within 4.26
    thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth
    house on his trip.

    Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from
    a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in 0.001 seconds, would be subjected to
    acceleration forces of 17,500 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems
    ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015
    pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him
    to a quivering blob of pink goo and a few white hairs....

    Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.
    2002 Silver Metallic A4 Firebird - All Options
    Hotchkis STB, Custom Madrel Bent 3" Exhaust, Pacesetter Headers, Whisper Lid, FT Ram Air, K&N Air Filter, D2S HID, Baer Rotors, !EGR, !MAF, 10% tint, Parrot CK3300

    Your Mom or My Dad?

  • #2
    [img]graemlins/slap.gif[/img] magic

    -AaronG

    Comment


    • #3
      Beautiful...
      -<i>Travis</i><br /><b>99 Trans Am, Pewter, A4</b> Forged, stalled, and cammed<br /><b>85 Buick Regal WH1 T-Type</b> It\'d be cool if it ran...<br /><b>94 Camaro 3.4, Teal, M5</b> The daily beater

      Comment


      • #4
        hahahahahahahaahahahah

        HE EXISTS

        Comment


        • #5
          WHY IS SANTA'S SACK SO BIG?
          ..
          ..
          ..
          ..
          ..
          ..

          BECAUSE HE ONLY CUMS ONCE A YEAR!!!

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by BirdOfPrey01:
            WHY IS SANTA'S SACK SO BIG?
            ..
            ..
            ..
            ..
            ..
            ..

            BECAUSE HE ONLY CUMS ONCE A YEAR!!!
            [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
            95 Firebird<br /> <a href=\"http://www.cardomain.com/memberpage/673250\" target=\"_blank\">http://www.cardomain.com/memberpage/673250</a> <br /> <a href=\"http://photobucket.com/albums/y217/andrewbrandon19/\" target=\"_blank\">http://photobucket.com/albums/y217/andrewbrandon19/</a> <br /><br />me on a good day------&gt; <a href=\"http://communicatio.webblogg.se/images/wet_cat_113159625.jpg\" target=\"_blank\">linky</a>

            Comment


            • #7
              [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] That makes me laugh everytime I read it! I love it. Good post man
              2000 silver A4 Camaro<br />Whisper lid; Free Ram Air; BMR stb; MSD super conductor wires; Gatorback belt?<br />1986 RX-7 (daily driver)

              Comment


              • #8
                Santa Claus died on the cross in order for good boys and girls to get presents on his birthday! :D

                :cool:
                <a href=\"http://www.geocities.com/red69falcon/\" target=\"_blank\">1969 Falcon</a><br /><br /><a href=\"http://community.webshots.com/album/81706526iUXWli\" target=\"_blank\">1972 Harley & Misc. Project Pics</a><br /><br /><a href=\"http://www.geoci

                Comment


                • #9
                  New research just in to show that Santa can indeed accomplish his task:

                  http://slashdot.org/articles/04/12/2....shtml?tid=105
                  SLP CAI, K&N, Whisper Lid, 180* thermo, manual fan switch, 3.42 gears, Auburn Pro LSD, Wester\'s PCM Tuning, TSP Rumbler, High Flow Cat. Best Time: 9.909@71.58 (1/8 mile)

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by Skapimp:
                    (oldie, but goodie)

                    There are approximately two billion children ( persons under 18 ) in the
                    world.

                    However, since Santa does not visit children of Muslim, Hindu, Jewish or
                    Buddhist religions (except maybe in Japan) , this reduces the workload for
                    Christmas night to about 15% of the total, or 378 million (according to the
                    Population Reference Bureau). At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children
                    per household, that comes to 108 million homes, presuming that there is at
                    least one good child in each.

                    Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different
                    time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west
                    (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second.

                    This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa
                    has around 1/1000th of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the
                    chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the
                    tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney,
                    jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house.

                    Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around
                    the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the
                    purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per
                    household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops
                    or breaks.

                    This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second--3,000 times
                    the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made
                    vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second,
                    and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.

                    The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that
                    each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the
                    sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On
                    land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even
                    granting that the "flying" reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount,
                    the job can't be done with eight or even nine of them--Santa would need
                    360,000 of them.

                    This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another
                    54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the
                    ship, not the monarch). 600,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second
                    creates enormous air resistance--this would heat up the reindeer in the
                    same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead
                    pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second
                    each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously,
                    exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in
                    their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporised within 4.26
                    thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth
                    house on his trip.

                    Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from
                    a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in 0.001 seconds, would be subjected to
                    acceleration forces of 17,500 g's. A 250 pound Santa (which seems
                    ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015
                    pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him
                    to a quivering blob of pink goo and a few white hairs....

                    Therefore, if Santa did exist, he's dead now.
                    OK, TWO WORDS "NITROUS OXIDE!"

                    Nuff said!
                    Race car - gone but not forgotten - 1997 firebird V6
                    nitrous et & mph: 12.168 & 110.95 mph, n/a 13.746 & 96.38 mph
                    2013 Dodge Challenger SRT8: 12.125, 116.45
                    2010 Ford Taurus SHO: no times yet

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      spraying reindeer? sounds dangerous. id like to see that though.

                      current car- 95 Trans am- bolt ons, parked and collecting dust. why? because **** it

                      Follow me!
                      http://www.twitch.tv/optimusprymrib
                      Or this

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        some guy named saint nick is the one who invented the x-mas day and he is still alive and counting all his money that we suckers spend for his gradifcations. and I think this crap was started about 150 years ago or so. because I dont ever remember santa kickn it with dino the dinosoaur. and on the flintstones they never had christmas.
                        member.cardomain.com/gman211203

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