The king of annoying coworkers

[Merlin]

or you could just bring the good ole M16 to work

[Blue Flame V6]

Originally posted by Merlin:
or you could just bring the good ole M16 to work

I've got an SKS the thought has crossed my mine.

[j_downey50]

Annoying co-workers... hm, let's compile a list:

Homeschooled Catholic Church-Girl:
She's homeschooled, so she works 12-5. She's a little goody-goody too. If you swear around her, she'll look at you as if you were Satan. She's also got no idea as to what kind of responsibilities are encompanied with holding a job. She leaves when she's scheduled to leave, no matter what. She won't stay after 5 minutes to clean up her own mess or finish something she was supposed to. She just leaves it for the night & weekend staff (ie, me). One night, our boss made her stay late (about half an hour) because we had a line out the front door. She almost cried. No joke. I've stayed HOURS late before to help out. She also refuses to come in early or on her days off if she gets called in. Everyone else has to, but she just whines her way out of it. Oh yeah, and she says we're all going to Hell because we work on Sundays.

Spanglish:
We call her Spanglish. She's from Venezuela and hardly speaks English. She has an incredibly strong accent too, so we can't understand a damn word she says. She's incredibly rude too. If you're in her way, she won't say, "excuse me" or anything, she pushes you out of the way. She orders everyone around like she's the boss, but she's been there the shortest time out of everyone in the company. She has the least seniority and doesn't understand that. Her hair is probably one of the most annoying things about her. It's got so much volume, it makes you wonder if she's stealing things from work and putting them in her hair. The front of it sticks out straight and flat, in a sort of semi-circle. We call it a surfboard-head. *****.

And the list could keep going, but I'll stop here.

Infernal - If you hired him, aren't you his boss? Ask him to come in early to have a meeting with you and talk to him about office behavior and manners. Also, tell him his eating habits gross out a lot of people at the office and if he's going to eat, he'll have to take a non-paid break off of the premesis.

[00firebird]

whats a swingline? a swinging clothesline? lol

[Infernal]

Swingline is a stapler manufacturer -- made popular by the movie Office Space. I actually have one, but it's not red like the one in the movie. It is made out of metal though, and weighs a good few pounds. I think it'd make an excellent weapon for bashing someone's skull in.

I know I'm the one who hired him, that's what makes it worse. Technically, yes, I am his boss, but our company is so small that we don't have an official power structure like that. Even though I hired him (with the owner's agreement), the owner of the company would have to fire him. He knows what the deal is, so it's up to him. In the mean time, I suffer.

I was actually thinking about trying to get an audio recording of him eating. What's a good way to get a really sensitive recording?

[12secondv6]

Is this on the mothership???

I ain't posting info about my co workers...... you soooooooooooooooooo don't want to know... some CRAZY mo fo's!

[vanbibber]

Originally posted by 97chevycamaro:
At least its not like the ***** who works with me, she blames me for **** she does like everyday. Like yesterday she accidently sent a direct bill account over to cash, tried to blame me. they yelled at me i went and reviewed the filed hilighted her name and log in # on the transaction and threw it on my bosses desk at him. hes shut up since then plus I took a piss in her diet coke the other day though, made me feel good.

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[imported_admin]

Originally posted by Infernal:
I actually have one, but it's not red like the one in the movie. It is made out of metal though, and weighs a good few pounds. I think it'd make an excellent weapon for bashing someone's skull in.

Model "747 classic". I think they gave it that part number because it weighs as much as a jumbo jet. Everyone comments about how heavy mine is whenever they borrow it, and they all say something along the lines of "wow, you could knock somebody out with this thing!"

Mine's red. ;)

And yes, we all have the one psycho employee that makes life miserable. At my old company there were quite a few morons (hence the company never making a profit in 5 years and eventually mass layoffs including me...). My nemesis was nicknamed "Skeletor". She was a 6'5" tall, skinny, mid-40's blonde woman. I've worn ties that have higher IQ's than she does. Unfortunately for me at the time, she was a childhood friend of a VP which is how she landed her position as a systems manager even though her entire life she had just been a secretary. No husband, no kids... but she has a dog... and she takes her dog to doggie day care every day. Before any of us knew this she would tell stories about the day care center and how the employees would groom Sunny, give her a bath, take her out in the yard, etc... my group members and I stared in disbelief thinking what the hell kind of crackhead are you, who sends your daughter to a place like that??? It wasn't until several months later we found out Sunny had four legs. But we didn't find that out until after we'd had an hour-long discussion on how to stop her from drooling when she was excited. Sunny is ten years old.

[Dan M]

I work at a gas station. Nuff said? No? Ok... well most of my coworkers are just lazy. I often come in and have to clean up someone else's work before closing. It's ok, I read for a couple hours and work for 30 minutes. It's not bad. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[j_downey50]

Originally posted by Stefan:
My nemesis was nicknamed "Skeletor". She was a 6'5" tall, skinny, mid-40's blonde woman.

[img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] We nicknamed a girl in high school Skeletor... she was about 6'3" (same as me) and weighed around 105 lbs (about 115 lbs less than me). She also had a really really short haircut which made her horse face even longer. :shudder:

Originally posted by DrSquirts:
I work at a gas station. Nuff said? No? Ok... well most of my coworkers are just lazy. I often come in and have to clean up someone else's work before closing. It's ok, I read for a couple hours and work for 30 minutes. It's not bad. [img]tongue.gif[/img]

I just got a new vision of you... it's the guy that works at our local Speedway.
He's got really thick glasses, he's about 70 years old, and his mustache is really long and curls on the ends. Like the monopoly guy, but without the white hair. He stands there and eats stuff off the shelves and won't help you or ring you up until you yell at him. His voice is really raspy too. I forgot his name, but it was a funny one. Love that guy.

[pr95blackbird]

Originally posted by Blue Flame V6:
I work with a dick like you. I'm an airplane mechanic and well you all know how mechanics are. Well this guy knows everything and he was mouthing off one day and another coworker almost ran him over with our tractor but didn't think he could quite make it look like an accident. Then one day the ****er walks up to me and lifts his leg and farts at me and says "kisses". I damn near punched the mother****er out in the middle of the hangar my boss was like o **** when he saw the look on my face. I doubt punching a 70 year old(I think) out would be considered nice on a work record but it was tempting. I say pick up an annoying habbit and he might stop. [/QB]

hahhahahahhah i had tears from reading that one
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[BirdOfPrey01]

OMG, THIS MEXICAN GUY THAT I HAD A DESK NEXT TO WAS ABSOLUTLEY IDIOTIC.

This guy would not stop talking perverted, i swear every five seconds he would say something about pussies and azzholes, cum, poop, piss, vagina, penis. He was like 28 years old. I wanted to break his nose :mad: :mad: :mad:

[99V6Camaro]

Originally posted by 97chevycamaro:
I took a piss in her diet coke the other day though, made me feel good.

I think i pissed my pants after reading that one!! [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]