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  • The fastest thing on earth

    An office manager was given the task of hiring an individual to fill a job opening. After sorting through a stack of resumes he found four people who were equally qualified. He decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.

    The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table the interviewer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?" Acknowledging the first man on his right, the man replied, "A THOUGHT.

    It just pops into your head. There's no warning that it's on the way; it's just there. A thought is the fastest thing I know of."

    "That's very good!" replied the interviewer. "And now you sir?" he asked the second man.

    "Hmm....let me see. A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of."

    "Excellent!" said the interviewer. "The blink of an eye... that's a very popular clichi for speed." He then turned to the third man who was contemplating his reply.

    "Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch.

    When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light in the barn comes on in less than an instant. Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of."

    The interviewer was very impressed with the third answer and thought he had found his man "It's hard to beat the speed of light" he said.

    Turning to the fourth and final man, the interviewer posed the same question. The last man replied, "After hearing the three previous answers, It's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA."

    "WHAT!?" said the interviewer, stunned by the response.

    "Oh I can explain." said the fourth man. "You see the other day I wasn't feeling so good and I ran for the bathroom. But, before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already sh*t my pants!"

    HE GOT THE JOB
    <b>Trucks</b> <br />\'05 Dodge 3500 Dually <i>Cummins Turbo Diesel</i><br />\'98 Dodge 2500 4x4 <i>360 V8 (Wife\'s)</i><br /><b>Toys</b><br />\'81 Chevy K10 <i>Stroker/Swampers/Custom Suspension/1-Tons/Beadlocks</i><br />\'99 Camaro Z28 <i>6 Spd, T-tops, Borla</i><br /><br /><b>Real trucks don\'t have spark plugs</b>

  • #2
    hahahahhahahahahahahaaa
    Mystic Teal Metallic
    ET:15.1 NA 14.3@96 MPH 75 Dry Shot

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    • #3
      lol

      "Money can't buy me happiness, but I'm happiest when I can buy what I want"
      05' CTS-V
      00' Camaro - SOLD :(

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      • #4
        very nice, mad props
        96 Camaro 3.8 A4 Basemodel: 8 mm wires, Shift Kit, Hollowed <br />Cat(o2 sims), RKSport exhaust, IAT 5.6K resistor, Home Depot CAI<br />&gt;&gt;&gt;15.375 @ 89.27&lt;&lt;&lt;NEW BEST TIME <a href=\"http://www.cardomain.com/memberpage/552491\" target=\"_blank\">http://www.cardomain.com/memberpage/552491</a>

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        • #5
          [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
          99 WS6
          13.25@104.97 - Lid + soon to be more other stock items ;D

          Originally posted by camaroextra
          tears are great lube, but its hard to get a girl to cry onto her own ***.

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          • #6
            haha
            Black \'94 Trans Am A4- SLP CAI & Loudmouth<br />Red \'93 Firebird A4- Ram Air under the WS6 hood, !cat, exhaust.

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            • #7
              lol.... [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
              09 Nissan 370Z MB M6 Sports Package
              sigpic

              www.the370z.com

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              • #8
                haha who thinks of these jokes!
                Dave:
                00 Supercharged Camaro - RIP
                97 Turbo Camaro - Sold

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                • #9
                  [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] we will never know haha ^
                  95 black 3.8 camaro, Intake, Pacesetters, Flowmaster 80 series, accel plugs and wires, B&M shift kit (eh could be better), hopefully a highflow cat soon. and a bunch of appearance mods.

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                  • #10
                    haha lol [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
                    <a href=\"http://www.cardomain.com/ride/2038380/5\" target=\"_blank\">http://www.cardomain.com/ride/2038380/5</a> <br />pacesetter hi-flo cat, slp loudmouth 2 w/3.5 slash tips<br />Springtech lowering springs 1.75 drop<br />Hurst sts w/ short-throw stick<br />Not yet installed-pacesetter headers<br />Zexel-torson lsd<br />3.73\'s

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                    • #11
                      [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] thats hilarious

                      current car- 95 Trans am- bolt ons, parked and collecting dust. why? because **** it

                      Follow me!
                      http://www.twitch.tv/optimusprymrib
                      Or this

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                      • #12
                        [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
                        <a href=\"http://pics.projectpredator.com/thumbnails.php?album=16\" target=\"_blank\">2003 Zinc Yellow Mustang GT</a> 1 of 701<br />ET : TBD<br />But our shenanigans are cheeky and fun! Yeah, and his shenanigans are cruel and tragic. Which... makes t

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                        • #13
                          Hehe. :D

                          :cool:
                          <a href=\"http://www.geocities.com/red69falcon/\" target=\"_blank\">1969 Falcon</a><br /><br /><a href=\"http://community.webshots.com/album/81706526iUXWli\" target=\"_blank\">1972 Harley & Misc. Project Pics</a><br /><br /><a href=\"http://www.geoci

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                          • #14
                            figured I'd add this to the thread:

                            The Marine Corps's General Reinwald was interviewed on the radio the
                            other day and you have to read his reply to the lady who interviewed him
                            concerning guns and children. Regardless of how you feel about gun laws
                            you gotta love this!!!! This is one of the best comeback lines of all
                            time. It is a portion of National Public Radio (NPR) interview between a
                            female broadcaster and US Marine Corps General Reinwald who was about to
                            sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military installation.

                            FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to
                            teach these young boys when they visit your base?

                            GENERAL REINWALD: We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery,
                            and shooting.

                            FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it?

                            GENERAL REINWALD: I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the
                            rifle range.

                            FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous
                            activity to be teaching children?

                            GENERAL REINWALD: I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle
                            discipline before they even touch a firearm.

                            FEMALE INTERVIEWER: But you're equipping them to become violent killers.

                            GENERAL REINWALD: Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're
                            not one, are you?

                            The radio went silent and the interview ended.
                            2002 Silver Metallic A4 Firebird - All Options
                            Hotchkis STB, Custom Madrel Bent 3" Exhaust, Pacesetter Headers, Whisper Lid, FT Ram Air, K&N Air Filter, D2S HID, Baer Rotors, !EGR, !MAF, 10% tint, Parrot CK3300

                            Your Mom or My Dad?

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                            • #15
                              OMG lol. Very good comeback ^^^ [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
                              -Eric<br />2002 Navy Blue Camaro...Striped and Stalled. 35th Anniversary SS wheels <br />Best ET: 15.384 @ 88.32 on street tires<br />Project Whitney: Goal, 14.0 1/4 by summer 2008.

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