Anyone else have the nice guy/shy guy syndrome and are tired of it? (rant)

[Tobes]

Originally posted by Machiavelli:
Also, NEVER tell a girl she is hot.
Instead, the next time you see her if she looks like she put a good ammount of time into her appearance say "oh you look nice today" and keep on truckin with the conversation.... DO NOT sit there like a complete douche bag waiting for her to say thank you - she heard it. Girls dont like strings anymore than anyone else, so if you start to send out clingy or overbearing signals youre gonna lose out.

I agree completely. Also, dont let a stupid punk that you work with tell you that you can or can not have a girl. What the hell does he know? I was a fat guy in h/s and some of college, now I'm 50lbs lighter.. but back then I still got some fine girls. Mostly cause I knew how to pick em. But, more importantly, because I knew that no matter what the girl looks like, you never know what she's looking for in a guy until you go up to her and talk to her. Patience is key.


T

[Trunks]

Originally posted by ravenp:
At least you've identified the problem... that's the first step. Anyone who thinks the problem is with the other person involved is always wrong ;)

You have to get some confidence... i'm no therapist, but you've mentioned your weight a few times.

My advice(again not a therapist), is get on a low-carb diet, exercise 4 days a week and you'll see yourself transform so fast I DARE you not to get confident!

FYI, i am low-carbing , i've lost 43-45 pounds....k? [img]smile.gif[/img]

[ June 07, 2004, 08:33 PM: Message edited by: Trunks ]

[98v6]

being funny is usually a good place to start, but this girl i used to really like saw me sat and followed me around and it was SOOO annoying that i eventually just left. nobody likes anybody to be too nice, but then again if you dont talk to her at all that sucks too. Just find the happy middle, and remember that practice makes perfect.

[pontiac nino]

Originally posted by Machiavelli:
Also, NEVER tell a girl she is hot.
Instead, the next time you see her if she looks like she put a good ammount of time into her appearance say "oh you look nice today" and keep on truckin with the conversation.... DO NOT sit there like a complete douche bag waiting for her to say thank you - she heard it. Girls dont like strings anymore than anyone else, so if you start to send out clingy or overbearing signals youre gonna lose out.

Thats some good advice you shouldn't tell her she god's gift to man but just telling her "oh you look nice today" just kinda gives her a sample of what she wants to hear and makes her crave more. What you need is that cocky, don't care atittude, maybe you should have bought that LS1 after all. :D

[Alexcab7]

Ode to Nice Guys

Alex

[token sebring]

okay, here's my .02, being a girl and all. Women are almost always more insecure than guys - mostly because not only do they feel pressured to look good to guys, but also to women (women are catty and will rip another woman to shreds faster than a guy will, unless they happen to be out of high school and more secure with themselves).

As far as the "nice guys'" question about why good looking, nice women always end up with *******s - it's not usually by choice. A lot of times, nice, attractive guys suffer from the problem of self-defeat, and are too intimidated to talk to women they think are out of their league. Chances are, at least half the hot girls out there get stuck either dating jerks or dating no one (from previous bad experience) because the nice guys never talk to them. One of my good friends had this problem for years... the girl looks like Barbie and is smart to boot (minus blonde moments) - she can cause brawls in bars just by walking by, but until she met her fiance, it was only idiots who would ever approach her.

The key thing is, don't play games - the girls you will be happy with in the end don't really play them, and if they do, it's a matter of self-preservation from suffering previous *******s.

Also, remember that if someone is an *******, they will become less and less attractive as you get to know them (even if they looked like [enter hot person here] before), and if they are nice, they will become more and more attractive as you get to know them (even if they didn't look like [enter hot person here]). I'm not dissing physical chemistry - there is a lot to be said for it, but in the end, "attractive" involves a lot more angles than just a first glance [img]smile.gif[/img]

[Machiavelli]

just want to point out that tokensebring didnt contradict anything I said.

[token sebring]

i wasn't there to contradict - just offer up some advice of my own based on the women I know ;)

[Seth]

You really just have to be yourself. There's nothing like being a nice guy.... Just don't over do it and let the girl walk all over you... That's my 2 cents....

[4thgenowner]

being shy sucks.. that is all...

[wannabe]

My advice for Trunks:

Go home and watch Swingers (starring Vince Vaughn and John Favreau).

[hawgs]

Originally posted by wannabe:
My advice for Trunks:

Go home and watch Swingers (starring Vince Vaughn and John Favreau).

You're so money!

[camaronat]

LOL, one of the hardest things in life to overcome

[OrangeBird]

I believe Machiavelli was right on the money but im also gonna add something.

the quote below was by my friend, (its not word for word but ill do my best) who gave me this advice and i must say that it works....people are often intimidate by women because they think...oh man shes way out of my league or she look so stuck up and etc etc....i used to be so shy in high school that i couldnt get the courage enough to ask women out till i got into college and i met this guy. he told me lots of things and the one below is an example of what he told me. If you want more ill post or email if you guys want it and no this guy is not a pimp or player but hes a hit with the ladies and i must say his technique works well...its all in Appearance and Self Confidance!!!


You ever notice why some women women always make eye contact and hold it longer than others, and in most cases, the women who fail to maintain eye contact are the best looking. Each woman is unique, so their reasons for not maintaining eye contact could be any of a variety of things. However, after a lot of thought and research I've found out why these perfect 10's tend to make eye contact much less than other women.

they do this for a variety of reasons, but a few shine through the rest. The majority of these women will fail to maintain eye contact because: they are insecure, they are stuck up, or they lack social interaction.

Youre probably wondering "How the hell could a woman that looks that good be insecure?" You would be surprised how many really hot women are insecure, and they are because of the same reason you would think that they would not be... they know that they look good. This puts a great deal of pressure on them, and very small flaws in their appearance that would barely bother an average person (pimples, bad hair days, broken nails, etc.) make them feel like it's the end of the world. This type of mentality constantly attacks their self confidence, which in turn makes them afraid to maintain eye contact in order to not draw any attention to these "flaws".

Now lets high-tail it over to the complete opposite of the drawing board and take a look at the infamous ice queens. These women who are "stuck up" are that way for the same reason that the others are insecure... they know that they look good. The reason why they tend to go to one extreme or the other... remains a mystery. I'm not exactly sure why some turn out to be stuck up while other do not... let's just blame that on genetics However, I do know that these snobby women stay that way because of their daily dose of confidence "boosters", which come in the form of men staring at them or compliments that they receive on their looks. The good news is that these women almost always drop the "ice queen" act if you get up the balls to approach them, as they will be very surprised that you did so, and that brings us to our last category of women because ALL of these women fit that bill also...

Almost all of these "stuck up" women lack social interaction, because they scare off most of the men who would approach them if they didn't think that they would be rejected. I'm not talking about social interaction in general, like simply talking to people, I'm saying that they are rarely "hit on" in the PROPER manner. 99% of the time that these women are hit on is by the only type of men that have the balls to do so, which are known as the "male pigs". These men will hang out the window of their car and shout something like "Woooohoooo, shake that *** baby!" or "Damn, your fine!". I don't fully understand why they do this... maybe they think that they are being cool? That's another unsolved mystery, let's just blame that on genetics also These women only get hit on in a manner such as that, which makes them believe that *almost* all men are like that, and the truth is... they are right. That is the same reason why us players are some of the only guys who have the ability to date women like these, and on that note I would like to thank all of the "male pigs" out there for making my job so much easier

When you approach these women using the proper methods, they will be very happy that you did so because this rarely happens to them, and once you learn to play your cards right you will be able to pick them up with ease. I'm not saying that you will be able to pick up every hot woman that you approach, there are still some that think that they are too good for anyone who isn't a model with over 10 million in the bank... those women can have fun trying to find a man like that, I wish them good luck in their search. Just remember that things only happen when you make them happen, so suck it up and initiate the conversation, or it'll never take place. Take my advice and soon you'll be picking up and dropping more dimes than the sprint lady!

[OrangeBird]

oh yeah and i forgot to mention...ever wonder why women seems to be attracted to jerk? because of CONFIDANCE. Im not saying that you need to turn yourself into a jerk but all you need is self confidance and be ASSERTIVE. :cool:

ill admit i could use some self confidance every now and then but i think its been better for me since high school