It's official- I'm single again

[majeskyb]

My wife is currently in the process of moving the furniture out of our house. She wanted to be single (many reasons including Mommy and Daddy didn't pay enough attention to her as a child, we were married at too young of an age, she hasn't been able to make enough decisions on her own, along with any others that you can think of that makes it sound like marriage is a bad idea). As you can expect, I haven't been in the greatest of moods today, considering I was able to meet her new "friend" Will. I don't know, I wasn't expecting this. I knew we were having problems, but she never gave us a chance to work them out. She refused for us to seek professional help, or anything, stating she knows it will not help. So, now, I'm sitting on my couch writing this. No dining room table, or any tables or flat surfaces to eat at for that matter. On the bright side, I ordered myself a bed last night. Only a month or so of sleeping on a futon until it arrives :naughty:

I hope this hasn't sounded like a rant, or a drunken post. Just letting my extended family know what's going on here. I have a sneaking suspicion that it's the state. I'm one of 5-10 marriages that have gone sour at my work within the past year or so

[loser]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

i was going to say thats horrible news, but the way its sounds its probally for the best. and you dont seem like you want to kill yourself so thats good too. i dont really know what to say( too young ) im sure it must suck. good luck, keep us updated man, i hope everything works out.

[BLLDOGG]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

sorry buddy

are you going to go the route of accusing her of adultery with this Will so you can keep your stuff? I only say this cause you dont want a women like that ripping you a huge one in court.

[majeskyb]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

I don't know. I mean, I have proof that she had an affair while I was deployed last year, but I'm not sure if I want to. If she starts to get really stupid with everything, I might. Right now, I just want my divorce paperwork so I can stop dealing with her.

[kristen]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

sure to hear the news dude. just make sure that you take the right amount of time to get over it. don't drink, do drugs, etc!!!hehe chear up

hey i mean at least you still have you camaro!

[Fbody3400]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

I don't know. I mean, I have proof that she had an affair while I was deployed last year, but I'm not sure if I want to. If she starts to get really stupid with everything, I might. Right now, I just want my divorce paperwork so I can stop dealing with her.

If shes the type of women that would cheat on a man that is deployed, you shoulda left her first. Thats just ****ed up on her part and if I were you i'd do everything in your power to get something out of that. Jeez, the movie Jarhead comes to mind....

But anyway, you sound like your taking it alright (joking, etc.), just make sure you don't get down on yourself cause its not your fault.

[Question]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

I feel your pain, brother. If you need anything, feel free to IM me and I will try my best to help you out just like you helped me out. I'm here for you man, even if you just need someone to listen.

[slow6]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

sorry dude, but its probably a good thing!
thats one of the reasons i dont like the services/or a deployed contractor...
seen this crap happen too many times...
even been in the middle of it once...

[kala]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

she had an affair while I was deployed last year,

if a women cheats on her husband when he is deployed , that's messed up...i am glad you don't have to spend rest of your life with her..... good luck man.....

[98DC]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

I don't know. I mean, I have proof that she had an affair while I was deployed last year, but I'm not sure if I want to. If she starts to get really stupid with everything, I might. Right now, I just want my divorce paperwork so I can stop dealing with her.

Bro,
I don't know you. But from someone who is in the club that your now in. Don't lay down! you will reget it once you move out of the 1st phase of the divorce.

the 3 phases pf divorce

1st comes, regret and the strange will to want to "stay friends" or "not make a fuss over it" because your life just got jacked and it hurts so dam much you are willing to do just about anything to make it stop.

2nd Comes, Anger and the fighting. long a$$ phone calls and a boat load of mud throwing. This is usually when the bar dating and having the outlook that "every night is a friday" is going to come into play. You will have some fun but, it's not going to do you any good either. It's going to be very hard to keep it together durring this time.

3rd comes, Bitterness.... And you may become a very good lier. When people ask how you are doing your going to become very good at telling them what they want to hear which isn't really the truth of things, you will learn that only your closest friends and fam will want to hear that your life sucks and that your not sure if you will ever be able to trust anyone to that level again. Most people just want to see you keep your chin up and tell them that your hanging in there, or that you doing just fine.

I have been divorced or in "the club" a little bit over a year now and I'm still in 3. My buddy says that I may never shake my self out of it.

That's the thing about marrage, no madder how much you put into it, at any givin point she can wake up the next day, take 1/2 of everything you have and make you pay her $$$$ for half the term of the marrage.

So with all of that said, welcome to the club.... It sucks...don't lay down, get a lawyer and fight like h#LL, You will be ok...

[josh98bird]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

sure to hear the news dude. just make sure that you take the right amount of time to get over it. don't drink, do drugs, etc!!!hehe chear up

hey i mean at least you still have you camaro!

things work out for the best, more time for ya car...

[FirebirdGT]

Re: It's official- I'm single again

You can either forgive her and move on and just forget that it ever happened to you and continue on in your life or believe what she did to you was horrible and you didn't deserve that and no one should deserve that and you can just sit there and be mad at her.

But then your whole life is going to be wrapped up in it and you won't be able to move on. And you'll always think to yourself, "My life would be so much better if she never had happened" and just blame everything on her.


All you really have is the NOW. The past is gone and can not be redone, and the future is ALWAYS the future.


With that, I strongly suggest that you speak with someone experienced in helping, a counselor, a minister.