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  • Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

    The Republican-led Brady Campaign to Stop Car Violence announced today that the results of last week's election, which gave control of the Senate and House to Democrats, show that the public is demanding a ban on race cars.

    "Race cars have no legitimate transportation purpose," said Republican Paul Helmke, head of the Brady Campaign. "You don't need a Ford Focus to tow a boat. It would pull the boat to smithereens." He added, "We're not trying to take anybody's cars, we just want to get deadly race cars like the Ford Focus and Honda Civic off the streets."

    In an appearance with Senator Dianne Feinstein (DLC-CA), activists explained why banning race cars is so important. "Unlike conventional cars, race cars don't have to be steered, but merely pointed in the general direction of where you want to go," explained Tom Diaz of the Vehicle Policy Center (VPC). "And the rear wings on these cars enable them to slide sideways around corners."

    "I'm tired of 13-year-olds running down 8-year-olds with NASCAR stockers," said a spokesperson for the Democratic Leadership Council, which has made the race-car ban its top legislative priority since the early 1990's. "We need to get these deadly race cars off the streets. They are the transportation of choice for bank robbers and drunk drivers."

    "Race cars like the Honda Civic are truly vehicles of mass destruction whose only purpose is to outrun as many police cars as possible without having to refuel," added John Rosenthal, head of the Massachusetts-based Stop Car Violence. "Many of these cars are designed to go 350 mph."

    Helmke also noted that if someone snapped and went on a road rage incident, driving a Civic would make them much more dangerous than if they were driving a more conventional vehicle like a Chevrolet Suburban. "This is just common sense car control. Our bill doesn't affect responsible car owners. We're not trying to take away anybody's Hummer H2; our bill specifically targets race cars like the Mazda 3."

    Incoming senate Democrat Jim Webb, an opponent of the ban who recently defeated Allen Macacawitz in the Virginia senate race, objected to the proposed ban. "Banning sport compact cars is stupid, doesn't help address drunk driving, and is guaranteed to piss off car owners. Congress has bigger fish to fry, like figuring out what to do with Iraq, helping people who don't have health insurance, and stopping the flood of jobs going overseas."

    Feinstein dismissed Webb's concerns as right-wing gibberish. "Everybody knows that the #1 threat to this country is people driving race cars on the highway," she said. "Al Qaida wants to buy Honda Civics with wings so they can destroy our freedom. They hate us for our freedom. Oh, wait, that was George's line."

    President George W. Bush, a supporter of the Race Car Ban, said he'd sign the ban if it gets to his desk. "I don't think its a good thing in our society for people to have these cars," said the President, reading from a Teleprompter. "It's just Unammerican. They should drive pickup trucks instead. Only terrorists and illegals would want to drive Civics." He added that no civilian car needs a rear wing. "You know, wings are for flying, and, uh, cars aren't supposed to fly."

    The Race Car Ban of 2006 bans all compact cars with two or more of the following racing features:

    Four valves per cylinder
    Aerodynamic spoiler or wing that protrudes conspicuously above the trunk lid or rear deck
    Air dam
    Hood scoop
    Chrome exhaust tip
    Levitation lights
    Afterburner


    The Race Car Ban would also ban the following race cars by name:

    Honda Civic (all models)
    Subaru Impreza WRX
    Mitsubushi Lancer (all models)
    Honda S2000
    Volvo S40
    Mazda 3 and Protoge
    Toyota Corolla
    Scion (all models)
    Saturn Ion
    Bentley Speed 8
    NHRA Top Fuel dragster
    Caterpillar D9
    Boeing 737
    Airbus A380


    In order to reassure car owners, the bill's sponsors included a long list of non-race cars that are not affected by the legislation:

    BMW 3-series
    Cadillac CTS-V
    Cadillac Escalade
    Chevrolet Suburban and Tahoe
    Ford Edsel
    Ford Model T
    Ford Mustang (without wing and spoiler)
    Ford F-150
    Hummer (all models)
    Jeep Grand Cherokee
    John Deere Tractor
    Kenworth T2000
    Sopwith Camel


    The bill also makes it a felony to own a car manufactured after Sept. 14th, 1994, that has a fuel capacity of more than ten U.S. gallons of fuel.
    <br /><br /> <a href=\"http://www.cardomain.com/id/nitroxxx28\" target=\"_blank\">http://www.cardomain.com/id/nitroxxx28</a>

  • #2
    Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

    ya know, 1 April isn't for a few more months

    and why isn't the chevette in the banned list? it's the stealth 'vette
    1978 Formula 461 in progress of being built :rock:
    2013 Ram 1500 Big Horn

    former owner of 85 bird w/ 2.8 - 3.4 - 3800 II - 5.0
    94 comero 3.4

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    • #3
      Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

      I don't think it will happen. Imagine the backlash.

      The SUV's are more of menace than any sportscars out there and they've been in more accidents than anything.

      Imagine cars like Corvettes, Mustangs and such disappearing from the road.

      But I have to admit that street racing has gone up and so has the fatalities.

      I'm surprise Prs. Bush would even jump on this. The man is into NASCAR, stock car drag racing, and such--what a typical Texan would like.

      1998 Firebird . 1989 Firebird XS . 1986 Fiero GT

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      • #4
        Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

        i find this hilarious..... NRA FTW!!!
        Phill<br /><br />95 camaro... need money for turbo project... <br />94 S10 Blazer - winter beater - infinity system to be installed soon<br /><br />\"The man who says it cant be done should not interrupt the man doing it...\"

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        • #5
          Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

          You my friend are a dumb Fu(k!
          Last edited by BLLDOGG; 11-22-2006, 09:04 PM.
          2000 3.8 A4 Pewter Camaro

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          • #6
            Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

            "Race cars have no legitimate transportation purpose," said Republican Paul Helmke, head of the Brady Campaign. "You don't need a Ford Focus to tow a boat. It would pull the boat to smithereens." He added, "We're not trying to take anybody's cars, we just want to get deadly race cars like the Ford Focus and Honda Civic off the streets."
            lol WTF?
            2k2 camaro, K&N, SLP whisper lid, Konis, AEM, HP Tuners, Angel eyes/Halos, CF SS ram air hood, 4.10s, Zexel Torsen, UMI SFCs, CrossFire, BFGs, Gatorback, Catco, Flows, and TLC! DONT feed the Trolls!

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            • #7
              Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

              what area would this apply to?
              sigpic
              1996 Chevrolet Camaro
              1995 Buick Park Avenue Ultra
              --Appearance Moderator--

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              • #8
                Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

                :bs: :bs: :bs:

                the day a civic runs 350 MPH on the street the world will end

                there no way thats true

                what car have less then 10 gallon tanks? ??? ?? ?
                www.turbov6camaro.com
                1997 3800 Series II Camaro
                4600 Stall for my ride to the mall :chug:
                7.18 @ 99.77 1/8 -1.8x sixty (current quickest v6 fbod)
                11.23 @ unk 5 1/4 - 7.19 1/8 - 1.83 sixty

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                • #9
                  Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

                  Is this a joke?! Because i couldnt stop reading, and relizing how dumb this sounds

                  -"And the rear wings on these cars enable them to slide sideways around corners."

                  -Al Qaida wants to buy Honda Civics with wings so they can destroy our freedom. They hate us for our freedom."

                  Wtf is this...im sorry im calling :bs: that this is real.

                  '96 Trans Am M6:) Cam, lifters, 1.6rr, lt4 springs, 4 bolt mains, long tubes, TDs, short throw...etc
                  '99 Firebird SOLD 1/4 mile 15.4 @ 86
                  '66 Ford SOLD

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                  • #10
                    Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

                    ok.... im not the only person here who sees this is mocking the "assault weapon" ban that Clinton signed in, right? or am i just reading into something that inadvertently looks exactly like it??
                    Phill<br /><br />95 camaro... need money for turbo project... <br />94 S10 Blazer - winter beater - infinity system to be installed soon<br /><br />\"The man who says it cant be done should not interrupt the man doing it...\"

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

                      Originally posted by Mighty Thor
                      I don't think it will happen. Imagine the backlash.

                      The SUV's are more of menace than any sportscars out there and they've been in more accidents than anything.

                      Imagine cars like Corvettes, Mustangs and such disappearing from the road.

                      But I have to admit that street racing has gone up and so has the fatalities.

                      I'm surprise Prs. Bush would even jump on this. The man is into NASCAR, stock car drag racing, and such--what a typical Texan would like.
                      i think this one flew right over your head thor :p tis a joke.

                      current car- 95 Trans am- bolt ons, parked and collecting dust. why? because **** it

                      Follow me!
                      http://www.twitch.tv/optimusprymrib
                      Or this

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                      • #12
                        Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

                        Dingdingding!! :d
                        <br /><br /> <a href=\"http://www.cardomain.com/id/nitroxxx28\" target=\"_blank\">http://www.cardomain.com/id/nitroxxx28</a>

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                        • #13
                          Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

                          Originally posted by FireBird_Fr3ak
                          Is this a joke?! Because i couldnt stop reading, and relizing how dumb this sounds

                          -"And the rear wings on these cars enable them to slide sideways around corners."

                          -Al Qaida wants to buy Honda Civics with wings so they can destroy our freedom. They hate us for our freedom."

                          Wtf is this...im sorry im calling :bs: that this is real.
                          LOL for real. the more i read the dumber it got so then i had to keep reading. so there guna ban civics, well better get started then collecting all 5bajillion of them...racecars....LOL
                          -RJ \"Like trail mix I\'m a lil sweet but mostly nutty\"<br />Metallic Blue 2001 3.8 Firebird M5<br />FRA,Smoothed Air lid, Homedepot Intake, K&N Air Filter, MSD Coils & Plug wires, Iridium Plugs, Flash Tune, 2.5 Flowmaster Catback.

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                          • #14
                            Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

                            Yeah this is a joke. It surfaced on the web a few years back when everyone and their mother's were purchasing imports. I mean, if you look at the list of banned cars, their is an airplane listed on there and the last one isn't even real.

                            Speaking of large protruding wings.....Has anyone seen the movie Cars? I think I was the only one in the movie theatre that laughed a little out loud when it showed the ricer cars and one of them had a like 5' wing on the back. I got it right away and my wife and daughter just kind of looked at me like I was on drugs. I'm just glad that I was the only one in the theatre at that moment who could enjoy the humor in that.

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                            • #15
                              Re: Looks like the Brady Campaign is after our cars now!

                              [QUOTE=Vanquish]Yeah this is a joke. It surfaced on the web a few years back when everyone and their mother's were purchasing imports. I mean, if you look at the list of banned cars, their is an airplane listed on there and the last one isn't even real. [QUOTE]

                              The last one is real. The Airbus is the biggest airplane right now, even bigger than the C5.

                              But ya fake all the way.

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